A "How To Guide" for Moms Who Don't Recognize the Woman in the Mirror After Baby
- drkelsydemelo
- Aug 15
- 5 min read
Updated: Aug 25
When my client Sarah (name changed) first reached out to me, she wasn’t looking for a weight loss program.
She was 3 months postpartum with her first baby, she was back to work and on the struggle bus and CONFUSED AF on how to start working out again after her c-section. Her body didn’t feel like her own. Her back hurt constantly. Her energy was drained. And most of all, she felt completely disconnected from herself.
One of the first things this former athlete said to me on our consult call was: “I don’t even recognize who I am anymore” - and that’s where our journey began ❤️.
The Starting Point: Survival Mode
Sarah didn’t want a “bounce back” plan. She wanted to feel normal again.
Daily tasks felt overwhelming. Nursing her baby, navigating stairs, even getting dressed in the morning came with discomfort.
Workouts were non-existent, which was totally abnormal considering how athletic she was prior to having her baby. This girl was on American Ninja Warrior! She was an athlete!! She felt so weak and embarrassed that she couldn't just "pull it together" —but HOW could she when no one had shown her how to rebuild?!
Step 1: The Healing Phase - Restoring Her Core from the Inside Out
Instead of jumping into crunches or cardio, we focused on the foundation: deep core rehab and breath work.
Why? Because your core doesn’t just need strengthening—it needs reconnection. Scar tissue, abdominal separation, and altered breathing patterns all play a role in how the core functions (or doesn’t).
The core isn’t just about abs—it’s your body’s powerhouse. It plays four essential roles, especially important after pregnancy:
Stabilization – Your core keeps your spine, pelvis, and ribs in alignment during every movement, from walking to lifting your baby.
Force Transfer – It connects your upper and lower body. When you pick up a car seat or push a stroller, your core helps distribute that effort efficiently and safely.
Postural Control – Your core supports upright posture, which often gets compromised during pregnancy and postpartum due to muscle imbalances and compensations.
Pressure Regulation – It helps manage intra-abdominal pressure during breathing, lifting, and even going tinkle—key for protecting your pelvic floor and preventing injury + pain.
Pregnancy stretches, weakens, and disrupts these systems. Rebuilding core function postpartum isn’t about getting a flat stomach—it’s about reclaiming stability, strength, and support from the inside out.
We used simple, strategic movements that helped her retrain her deep core and pelvic floor. And with that, her back pain started to ease and she could finally move without pain 👏🏼.
Step 2: The Bridge Phase - Lifting Smart, Not Just Hard
Once her foundation was solid, we moved into strength training designed specifically for postpartum bodies. This is why we can't skip step # 1!! If we don't have a strong foundation, the "house" will fall apart + this step is literally impossible!!
Our focus during phase 2 was 👇🏼
Improving posture to make sure her core continued to function properly after all the hard work we did in phase 1
Reducing joint stress to minimize the aches + pains that come along with mom-life
Building full-body strength to make day to day tasks like carrying her baby + being on her feet more doable
Her workouts were 20–30 minutes max at home with nothing but a couple bands and dumbbells. Nothing fancy. Nothing overwhelming. Just effective, accessible movement that worked with her schedule.
Step 3: The Comeback Phase - Where Dreams Come True
This the phase where we ACTUALLY started working on her goals. Once we re-established two important things: 1) connection to her core and 2) a foundation of muscle tone we felt comfortable upping the intensity of her exercise and challenging her a bit more.
In the Comeback Phase we focused on👇🏼
Adding in cardio to increase her calorie expenditure
Decreasing her calories (responsibly!) in order to lower her intake with the overall goal of fat loss
After laying the foundation in The Healing Phase and putting up the scaffolding in The Bridge Phase, we are FINALLY putting the finishing touches on this house - and the weight FELL OFF 🏠 💪🏼.
Another important note? We Fueled Her Body with Intention
Sarah didn’t go on a restrictive diet. We focused on fueling her body, to keep her milk supply high and help restore muscle tone.
It takes the body TWO YEARS to replenish all of the minerals, vitamins + nutrients lost during pregnancy. In addition, Sarah was breastfeeding, so her body needed a TON of food to make sure she was healing properly and gaining strength.
YOUR BODY CANNOT GAIN STRENGTH + MUSCLE TONE IF YOU'RE ON A DIET AND/OR SKIPPING MEALS 📣.
This looked like:
Eating enough protein to support healing, muscle repair and keep her milk supply high
Balancing meals for blood sugar stability and energy to make sure she could get through the day avoiding the 3pm crash
Ditching the all-or-nothing mindset around food and always having a plan with her nutrition so she wasn't ever just "winging it"
As her energy came back, so did her consistency. Her body began to respond—and the weight began to come off.
This journey wasn’t just physical. It was emotional.
She started to speak to herself differently.
She felt proud when she looked in the mirror.
She played with her kids on the floor without hesitation.
And that nagging voice telling her she’d never feel like herself again? Gone.
Sarah lost 30 pounds—but more importantly, she gained back her strength, her confidence, and her joy.
And just about the time she started to feel like herself... she got pregnant again and we FEARLESSLY repeated the process 💃🏻.
So where is Sarah today after two back to back c-sections chasing around two toddlers...?
LITERALLY THRIVING 👏🏼
"I've been training with Dr. Kelsy for over 5 years, including two postpartum journeys, and I can't imagine doing it without her. Unlike other trainers who push harmful calorie deficits, Kelsy understands that postpartum recovery is complex and deeply individual - more like a strategic game of chess than a one-size-fits-all plan. My body didn't respond the same way to exercise after kids, but Dr. Kelsy has had the knowledge, patience and intention to guide me through each phase with care. She always has a clear, detailed roadmap - your only job is to show up and trust the journey. I'm forever grateful for her expertise, support and friendship ❤️."
-Sarah, c-section mom
The Takeaway: You’re Not Broken. You Just Need a Plan That Respects Your Body.
This story isn’t a fluke. It’s what happens when you stop forcing your body to "bounce back" and start rebuilding from the inside out.
If you’re a mom recovering from birth (especially a c-section) who feels stuck, weak, or frustrated with your progress, know this:
➡️ You don’t need more willpower
➡️ You need a strategy that works for your body
Ready to start building back strength with personalized support?
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